Wife after returning from fishing trip with husband to neighbor: “I did everything all wrong again today — I talked too much and too loud. I used the wrong bait. I reeled in too soon and I caught more
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Two men have been sitting out on a lake all day long ice fishing. One has been having no luck at all, while the other has been pulling fish after fish out of his hole in the ice. The man having no luck finally leans over and asks the other what his secret is.
“mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm,” is the reply.
“I’m sorry, what did you say?”
“mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm,” the successful fisherman repeats.
“I’m sorry, I still didn’t understand you.” The man spits something into his hand and says very clearly,
“You’ve got to keep your worms warm.”
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A Cajun was stopped by a game warden in South Louisiana recently with two ice chests of fish, leaving a bayou well known for its fishing. The game warden asked the man, “Do you have a license to catch those fish?”
“Naw, ma fren, I ain’t got none of dem, no. Deez here are my pet fish.”
“Pet fish?”
Ya. Avery night I take deez here fish down to de bayou and let dem swim ’round for a while. Den I whistle and dey jump rat back inta dis here ice chest and I take dem home.”
“That’s a bunch of hooey! Fish can’t do that!”
The Cajun looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, “It’s de truth ma’ fren. I’ll show you. It really works.”
“Okay, I’ve GOT to see this!”
The Cajun poured the fish into the bayou and stood and waited. After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, “Well?”
“Well, what?” said the Cajun
“When are you going to call them back?”
“Call who back?”
“The FISH!”
“What fish?”
Folks in Louisiana may not be as smart as some, but they aren’t as dumb as most.
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Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge. One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across the bridge. He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head. The procession crosses the bridge and the man puts on his cap, picks up his rod and reel, and continues fishing.
The other guy says, “That was touching. I didn’t know you had it in you.”
The first guy responds, “Well, I guess it was the thing to do - after all, I was married to her for 40 years
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Ole and Sven went fishing one summer and decided to rent a boat from the resort instead of fishing from the shore. They rowed out a ways and started to fish. They caught one fish after the other.
Ole says to Sven, “I wish we could mark this spot. It s the best fishing I’ve seen since I was a boy.”
Sven replied, “I got some chalk in my tackle box, so why don’t I put an X right here on the bottom of the boat?”
Ole laughed, “You goofy brother of mine…What if we don’t rent the same boat next time.”
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